4 years ago

Lately I've been mainly on the home computer (again). I swear, one day I'll get around and get my laptop up and going again. I've been looking at some pictures of Quinlynne 4 years ago during this time of year. What a cutie little baby I had. There are pictures of when her hair was just beginning to curl, & the first time I put product in it. Pictures of her with her Poppa....she loved spending time with him. he went to a motorcycle rally and brought home a t-shirt for her that says "My Grandpa is a Biker". He was so proud when he came home with that t-shirt for her. Doesn't she look perfectly content there with him? Also, I think it's crazy how much she looks like him. (My dad, as you know, was a truck driver. His handle on the CB was Big Wheel. When I was a little girl, about the age of 1 1/2 or 2, he brought home a blue sweatshirt that he bought at a gas station with a picture on it and the words BIG WHEEL. I think I have some cute pictures of me in it!) And some pictures of Quinlynne in one of my favorite outfits ever. She looked so darn cute in it...even when she got hold of a straw that had some Amaretto on it! Thanks Mama Becca!

Preface this post

(OK, again, let me say that this is my blog & whatever I post on here is how I'm feeling at the moment. So, I mean no offense to any of you when I say the things I am going to say.)

Recently I saw someone I hadn't seen in almost two months. When I first met this person she was married. She & her husband started having problems (I'd say the root of the problems was split equally between the two of them. But, I'm not the one who was in the relationship, so that is just my opinion; the opinion of an outsider who knew both parties in the relationship.) ANYHOW- I knew this person was dating someone new the last time I saw her. When I saw her again the other day, she was remarried!!! Imagine my surprise! I told her congratulations & that I was happy for her. Inside, I was thinking "Another one?? WTH? What's wrong with me?"

Seriously, I guess this is just a pity party. However, what baffles the heck out of me is that some people get so many chances at love. I have yet to have that opportunity. Don't get me wrong, I have been near marriage once- but didn't go through with it because something just didn't seem right. I HAVE been in love. (Now I'm in love with my daughter.) What is it with me that is a repellent to men? Seriously. Do I have an absolutely terrible personality? Am I too stupid? Am I too smart? Am I too irritating? Am I ugly? Am I disgustingly obese to the point that no man would want to have me on his arm- much less touch me? Do I stink? Do I have halitosis? Am I looking at the wrong men? (You know what I mean here....you see nerdy people end up together; sporty people end up together; organic people end up together, etc.) Am I really a huge nerd & I'm unaware of this? (Funny insert here...a really good friend of mine whom I have been friends with the majority of our lives never had the opportunity to meet Quinlynne's genetic materials donor. When she found out that he was an athletic sort & had even played college football her mouth fell open. She couldn't believe I'd mated with an athlete! lol) Seriously....I want to know what it is about me that I may need to fix. Inside my head- I'm happy with almost every aspect of myself..except my body. I mean, there are a few things I want to learn how to do (like run) and those are personal goals of mine. BUT- I don't think my body is so terrible that it's not relationship material. I've seen women with much frumpier bodies than my own have great relationships with nice men.

Why is it that some people get so many chances at love and happiness in a relationship & marriage while I can't even get one?? It's heartbreaking at times, to say the least. Now let's all sing along...poor, poor pitiful me. That's my pity party & I just wanted to get it off my chest.

A post

I really don't like posting things very well unless there is a picture involved. I like to post pictures because 1) I think my kid is so darned cute & think others should thinks she is too, 2) I like to look at other people's pictures & assume they like to look at mine, and 3) it's my blog & I'll run it how I want. (Which, if the blog was the United States, would not work well because of the system of checks & balances in place within our government. NO...I'm not taking Political Science this summer because I didn't do so hot in it the first time I took it in 1994....)

I was going through my pictures so I'd have something to post about. I found this one.....

This is what happens a large majority of the time when I am up late trying to study. You see, being a mom in Nursing School, one does not start actually REALLY studying, reading, working on care plans and what-not until AFTER the child is in bed. If you're really lucky like I am, you have a child that slept better as an infant & toddler than she does as a preschooler. So, several times after she has been put to bed & gone off to sleep, I get a curly-headed mop of hair rubbing her eyes walking into the living room to tell me something, or ask me to put her back to bed, or get a drink of water, or lie down with her, or turn on her music, or to ask what she's going to wear tomorrow.....the list goes on and on. Eventually, I just give up. I let her sleep in the other recliner. Am I not terrible? And you know what's even worse than that? When I finally give up & put myself to bed....I leave her in the recliner. Yes, Mother of the Year right here. I try to wake her to get her to walk back to bed, but she won't do it. So, I just leave her. But, in the picture, she's sleeping. Doesn't she look put-out with the situation, though? I'll be so glad when I work & don't have to study sooooo much.

Fishin'

A couple of weeks ago Quinlynne went fishing for the first time. Unfortunately for me, it was during a weekend when I couldn't walk without the aide of a cane, and did not eat or drink anything because that would lead to other bodily function & it was way too painful to walk or sit. I know, I know...poor, poor pitiful me! I was able to drag myself from the bed long enough to take a few pictures of Quinlynne before her first fishing trip with Uncle Charlie! She got a new rod & reel (Barbie) that even came with sunglasses. They were not gone for too terribly long. But, Quinlynne caught a fish! I think it's a perch (sp?). Uncle Charlie didn't catch anything. They were thoughtful enough to bring it home so Momma could take a picture of Quinlynne with the catch of the day!

(Side note: The poor fish did, unfortunately, meet its demise. It could not be released into a pond here by the house even because it had swallowed the hook all the way down into its belly. Dumb fish!)

Dance recital

Quinlynne's dance recital has been on Sundays in the past. This year it was on a Saturday. Of course, as I stated in a previous blog entry, we had to be up & in downtown Tulsa at 8:40 Saturday morning for the walkthrough. I'm such a wonderful mother for being anywhere on a Saturday morning before 10:00. Charlsie, Penny & Penny's new grandbaby, Lizzie, came up from Arkansas to watch Quinlynne perform. Quinlynne was excited to give Lizzie the gift she'd been holding on to for her. It was time to get ready for the recital. I think Quinlynne was just excited because I put her makeup on her. I went all out, and didn't skimp on it. You'll see in the pictures. She really thoguht the "arrows" at the corners of her eyes were cool. Did I mention the large black feather on her head? The original one that came with the costume had apparently fallen out of the bag in Quinlynne's closet. The 7 month old cat got into the closet. Need I say more? I had to find someone to make a new feather contraption to don my child's head in her recital. Momma keeps the closet doors shut for a reason!!!

While waiting for the recital Quinlynne took the camera. Lovely pictures from a 4 year old. There are some pictures of Quinlynne with the 2 little girls she's been in dance class with since they were 2 years old. We took the picture of us ourselves. I may just be patting my own back, but I really think she's ending up with my smile.

I did not take any pictures of her during her dance because my camera will either record or take pics, not both at the same time. As soon as I can, i will post her dance on youtube for you to see. She really made me proud. To say she shook what her momma gave her is putting it mildly. She stopped during the dance once to scratch an itch she had on her leg, and to wave HI to me. Adorable. I'll work on posting to youtube soon. You'll love it!

After the recital, I got tired of holding on to the black feather contraption that belonged on Quinlynne's head. So, I stuck it in my heair and kept right on moving. My mother apparently thought that was hilarious because she had to take some pictures of it. Aren't I sexy? (I can't get the picture to move down here, so imagine it's posted right here!)

Quinlynne-isms

Quinlynne has really kept me chuckling the past few days.

On Monday evening Quinlynne & I went to swim at our neighbor's house. The kid has been hounding me for over a month about when we can go over there to swim. This past weekend they opened their pool & I gave in & called the neighbors to ask if we could come over. As we were getting in the pool, I turned around to look at Quinlynne. She was walking down the steps, got a huge smile & said "Oh perfect! This water is just amazing!" I am so not used to hearing these "big people" comments coming from her 4-year-old mouth!

Today we visited the neighbor's pool again. We got in the pool water & were in there for a couple of minutes. I swam over to Quinlynne. She was holding on to the side & walking along. She said "Just perfect. This water temperanear....temperanear.....temp...oh whatever that word is....is perfect!" I taught her about the word "temperature".

When we first got to the pool, I had helped Quinlynne down the steps and over to the part of the pool where she wanted to be. Fast forward about 15 minutes. I asked her to do something (I don't remember what it was). She replied "Sure. Because you did indeed help me down the stairs earlier." Seriously??? INDEED??? Oh my.

Oh- the last one. I was taking Quinlynne to the library to sign up for the Summer Reading Program. I told her we were going to Sonic first and asked her if she wanted anything to drink. (It was Happy Hour!) She replied in the negative. I asked her again. She again replied in the negative, and informed me it would take too long. Well, I just was not going to miss Happy Hour! If we went to the library first, Happy Hour would have been over by the time we left the library. So, I rolled down my window & placed my order for my drink only. We sat there. And sat there. And sat there. From the seat behind me I hear "See Momma, I told you it would take a long time." That's all she said. Just had to prove her point. I was in the front seat, trying to suppress the laughter. (The picture is from her recital. I'll post more pictures & about the recital later!)